PYHO--There's always something...

http://thingsicantsay-shell.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">http://i904.photobucket.com/albums/ac246/shellthings/pouryourheartout.jpg" />

This is a great way to get things off your chest, if you're interested, go link up with Shell and pour your heart out! Again, just a brief reminder that everyone linking is pouring their hearts out and we should all be respectful in our comments. ;)

Yesterday, I went and bought some new clothes. Well, they were new to me but I bought them from someone on Craigslist. I was looking for capris and none of them fit...which sucks. I have been losing weight and that just let me down.

This morning, I finally got an email back from the hospital that I'm wanting to work for and my references aren't the shining references I expected. That really bummed me out, even though I appreciated the recruiter being honest with me. It hurt my feelings too because when I speak to these references, they always speak really highly of me so I'm a little confused.

Wow...I hate when blogger screws up, it really annoys me!!! Anyway, yesterday, my boss essentially called me a liar. It made me really mad. I may be a lot of things but I am not a liar. The worst part of it is, she gets mad when I tell the truth. It's one of those damned if I don't, damned if I do situations and it's very frustrating. The worst part of it is, the one who suffers is my patient, which is hard for me. Sometimes when she makes me mad, I want to tell her all the things that she is doing that are just wrong but I don't. Some would say that I don't understand because I don't have to deal with the things that she does, however, I can assure you, I would do things differently. I wouldn't consider my family an "obligation" and those are her words, not mine. Don't misunderstand, I understand that families are not perfect and there are situations that I might think differently in but this is not one of those. Taking care of a family member when they can't take care of themselves isn't an "obligation", it's a responsibility. That, to me, is a huge difference. It's essentially taking care of someone with special needs who is physically, mentally and emotionally unable to care for themselves. They didn't choose to be this way, and while it is a difficult responsibility and it isn't what we would choose, we have to do the right thing in this situation and she does not. The majority of the time, she doesn't. She's a control freak to a fault. Don't misunderstand, I'm far from perfect in that area but I don't think that I am more important than other people. I treat everyone as a person and I want to do the best that I can, this is part of what drove me to become a nurse. I believe that everyone deserves the very best treatment regardless of who they are or what they've done. That being said, I choose not to work in certain places, such as a prison, because I don't feel like that is the right situation for me. However, if I have to care for a prisoner in my nursing career, they will get the same care as anyone else that I ever take care of. Sure, they've made poor choices and I may not necessarily like them but they still deserve to receive the best care that I can give and that's what they'll get. This is not the situation that I work in now. It makes me very sad and angry. However, I can't change the situation so I will continue to voice my opinion and do the right thing and hope that I can facilitate some change.

But, I digress...I say all of this to say, that there's always something going on that I don't like or that I don't want to deal with. However, there's always a bright side. Ultimately, I'm going to have a job as a nurse and I will be helping people!!! I'm in that process, which is always tough, but I know that I am going to land where I am supposed to be. I will take that experience and get the most that I can from it. Obviously, it won't be perfect but then again, there's always something! :) Have a great Wednesday everyone!!!