Friday, May 27, 2011

Friday Confessional...warning, this is pretty depressing...

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I'm bummed today...it's not been the greatest day for me. I'm trying really hard not to let it get to me but it does. Most of my friends have gotten their authorization to test from the board and have their NCLEX scheduled but I don't have mine. I called and talked to the board this morning and the lady I spoke to said it would probably be next week...but I want it to be today. It's not fair, I think I deserve to be testing with my friends and working and getting a job, but I'm not. And it bums me out...

I'm sitting here, in a sweat shirt, in May watching "The Chamber" and thinking that at least I'm not sitting on death row...and that I'm not a part of all of that kind of madness but that doesn't really make me feel better about my situation...so what does that say about me? Does that mean that I'm a selfish bad person because I'm more concerned about myself and my situation than anything else that's going on in the world right now? Maybe so, but I have to live in my world and I have to deal with what's going on in my world and right now, I can see nothing but myself and my problems...I am pathetic but right now, it's what and who I am. I know that I will feel better tomorrow, maybe even later today but right now, my life sucks and I just want to lay around and be a bum today.

Sorry this is so depressing...I just feel crappy today. My blog should be more upbeat tomorrow...

Update: I got two cards in the mail today congratulating me on my graduation and I got a little cash. Plus, I have great family and friends who love me!!! The day is looking up!!! :)

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Patience is a virtue

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Or so I'm told repeatedly...and yet, I find that I generally have none. It's very annoying, even to me and yet, I have a hard time "fixing" it. Obviously, I'm getting better with age but I don't know if I'll ever master it...so there it is...lol

I graduated on May 12 and am still waiting on my graduate nurse (gn) permit and my authorization to test to take boards. It's driving me crazy. I checked today and then found out soon after that everything should be in place by next Friday or a few days after. WOOHOO!!!! That's so exciting and scary as hell all at the same time. Of course, I am still waiting on the hospital to call me to confirm that I have a job. I'm fairly certain that I do, they did check my references and all. It's been several weeks though and I am running out of patience. I know that the hiring process for this hospital is a long one, I've worked there in the past...but it still drives me crazy.

The upside is that I will be able to stabilize financially soon. That's super exciting. I say stabilize with reverence however because obviously, there is no quick financial fix. If there were, then I would have already done that, along with the rest of the world. That isn't how things work though so I have a plan and help. I will also have people to hold me accountable. I hope that my followers will help me with that some as I'm sure that I'll blog about my struggles.

On that note, I'm going to make a list for the store...for things that I actually need!!! ;)

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

I DID IT!!!!



It's official, nursing school is OVER!!! I'm excited and scared all at the same time. I think I might be going crazy. My tear ducts are working overtime as I think back on these past two years. I have finished the hardest thing I've ever done...now what? It's still pretty surreal at this point but at this time tomorrow, it will be for real. I'm getting pinned tomorrow. Wow, that's shocking but awesome and scary. I know that I will be bawling my eyes out for the whole thing, it's super emotional. The hubs and I were talking about it earlier and I started crying...so I told him we had to talk about something else.

Even as I sit here writing this, I keep tearing up. These are a combination of happy and sad tears. A chapter of my life is ending and a new one is beginning. And I thought nursing school put me on overload...but this, this is something new. Tomorrow, I will stand there with my classmates as we graduate from nursing school. It's amazing and I still don't really believe it. I took my last final today and that didn't even seem real. I realized, after I left the parking lot, that it was the last time I would ever be there. It made me sad and excited at the same time. I'm not finished with my education by far but I have taken a huge step and it keeps hitting me over and over.

In a little over a month, I have to take the mother of all tests. I will be taking the NCLEX-RN which is the national test for nurses. Then I'll be an RN for real. Right now, I'm a graduate nurse even though I can't practice as one until next month...which sucks but hey, it is what it is and there's nothing I can do about it. As I sit here thinking about that test, my throat gets a little tight, once I take that test, it's as real as it can possibly get...and I'm not sure that I'm ready. I mean, intellectually, I know that I am but it's just scary as hell. Once I take that test, I am responsible for people's lives...and that's a huge responsibility. I take that very seriously which makes it even scarier.

So there it is, I finished school. I'm going to be able to work as a nurse in a month. Then I take the mother of all tests and I'll be a real nurse...it's crazy, but worth it!

Monday, May 2, 2011

 Monday Minute




1 - Where aside from a toilet have you taken a dump? Explain.


The forest on a camping trip.


2 - At this point do you really think that Magic Johnson has HIV/AIDS?

I don't know...I would have thought it would have gone into full blown aids by now so I'm thinking not.


3 - Would you wrestle a member of the same sex, nude, in pudding for 10 minutes for one million dollars?

Are we talking tax free? For sure that way but perhaps even if not...it is a million dollars after all!!!



4 - Squash just doesn't sound very tasty. What say you?

I love squash...all of it!!! :)


and finally...



5 - Is it worth the effort?

Depends on what I'm making an effort for...Nursing school has been worth the effort...I think...lol