I'M TIRED OF IT!!!!!

I AM SO TIRED OF PEOPLE...GETTING OFFENDED AND DUMPING ALL OVER SOMETHING THAT SOMEONE ELSE LIKES. STOP WEARING YOUR HEART ON YOUR DAMN SLEEVE!!!! STOP CHOOSING TO BE OFFENDED!!!! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!!!!

Sorry for the yelling but I am so frickin' done with all of it. No one is entitled to their opinion anymore because someone is always offended. Well guess what, they don't need or want your approval so SHUT THE HELL UP!!!! You have every right not to like something or not to agree with something but when someone else is trying to be positive, YOU DO NOT HAVE THE RIGHT TO DUMP ALL OVER IT!!!!! Seriously, you don't. If you don't like something, avoid it but please don't spread your hate, bitterness and ugliness all over it because I AM TIRED OF THAT BULLSHIT!!!!! And I know I'm not the only one...but I have lost my ability not to say anything about it. So here it is. 

Here is a prime example, one of my friends posted something on their Facebook page about Duck Dynasty with the caption "Good stuff" or something to that effect. One of this person's other friends said something to the effect of "Woohoo for the homophobic rednecks" and it totally and completely pissed me off. And I called this person out on it. BECAUSE I HAVE HAD ENOUGH!!!!! Like Duck Dynasty, don't like Duck Dynasty, I truly could give less of a crap. (I personally love it but that is just my opinion.) However, don't use someone else's page and opinions to spread your ignorance and hate...NOT YOUR BUSINESS OR YOUR CALL. Feel free to express your opinion but don't be an asshole about it because I WILL call you out. I have been that person in the past but I refuse to be that person now and I refuse to let anyone else be. AND I WILL NOT APOLOGIZE. If you don't like it, unfriend me. 

Gotta do it...

Today is one of those days, reflective kind of days. Got a lot of things banging around in my head...but yet, it's time to make a decision. And I hate making decisions, or maybe it's that I hate sticking to them, I don't know. But I have to do something. And today has to be the day that I begin. 

Let me start off with the things that I am happy with in my life. First and foremost, I'm happy with my husband. That man is amazing and I am truly grateful that he found me. He supports me and stabilizes me. He is amazing and I am blessed to have him in my life. He truly loves me unconditionally and even though our relationship is far from perfect, it is truly amazing and blessed.

I am also very grateful for my family. They are also an amazing support system. They are a blessing as well. There are a lot of times that I have been down and out that they have brought me back up. 

I am grateful for my job. I really truly feel that I am where I am supposed to be and love that I feel like I am finally making a difference in someone's life. This is one of the many reasons that I chose nursing and while I feel that the future may be uncertain, I am going to remain strong.

Ok, back to the original reason for this post. I am unhappy with some things in my life. Things that I am able to change and today that change begins. It is going to be a hard road but I am putting it out there because I need some accountability. I am part of an amazing group right now that will be some of my accountability, but I need more. So here it is.

First of all, I want to be healthy. That involves losing weight, obviously but there is so much more to it than that. I want to be able to do the things I used to do, I want to be able to run, play basketball (for fun of course), and get down on the floor and play with my nieces and nephews without having to worry about how the heck I will get back up. I want to eat food that actually fuels my body, not this overprocessed crap that's out there. I want my family to be healthy too but I have to start with me. I have to lead by example :) Health includes physical, mental and emotional. So there are a lot of things involved in that, and several avenues to pursue there. But this post will go on for eternity if I list all of this so suffice it to say, I have some work to do here.

Secondly, I want to stop second guessing myself, and being lazy. Part of being healthy involves exercise, which I actually don't mind doing, but I have serious pain, and I seem to have a problem getting around that. The pain leads to fear, that I won't be able to do what I set out to do. And so, to combat that, I'm just going to start. I'm going to exercise and eat properly. No, I won't be perfect, because no one is, but I want to be healthy overall and I just have to start going. 

So there it is, it's out there. I need some support and courage. But I am going to do this, in spite of myself. :)

I have to say this.

There was a terrible tragedy yesterday. A young woman and a young man lost their lives. My heart goes out to their families. There are so many unanswered questions. Why being the most obvious question. This is a question we may never know the answer to. Perhaps these two young people had a strained relationship, but that doesn't explain why this happened the way it did.

All of that being said, there is a writer out there who blames the gun, as if the gun, being an inanimate object, can possess the person and cause a shooting. No, that is not the case. This is not an argument for gun control. I own guns, multiple guns and have never shot another human being in anger or even in self defense. While I believe that self defense is a whole different issue, let's focus on guns and why owning a gun doesn't automatically make you a killer, or more likely to kill another person.

A gun is just an object, a tool if you will. Guns are used for many things and they will be used incorrectly, just like every other object or tool out there. Using this incident to say that we need gun control is the same as saying that no one should be able to drive cars because people drive drunk. Taking away cars won't solve the problem, neither will taking away guns. Actually, should someone come to try to take my guns, that might be enough to provoke me into being violent. I have the right to own a gun and carry a gun, this is a right given to me by the Constitution. You, by the same token, have the right not to own or carry a gun. Does this mean that just because I own a gun and you don't that I will kill you? No, I make the choice not to kill other people. I have emotions, I have been angry, and yet, I still haven't used my guns to kill the people that caused me to be angry. I have to make the choice to handle my anger another way. Perhaps this wasn't an anger issue, I don't know. However, I do know that trying to make this a gun issue is like saying that cars kill people. When a drunk person gets in a car and causes an accident that takes lives, no one blames the car, so in this case, the gun is not to blame, the person is. This is a terrible tragedy but do not overlook the truth of the issue. Javon Belcher killed his girlfriend and himself, not the gun. 

Dear Dallas Cowboys

Dear Dallas Cowboys,

I am writing this letter to you to tell you that it's time. It's time to play the game of football, with the abilities that you have. I want you to play to the best of your abilities. Your fans are tired...and disappointed because we know that you are better than this. It's time, time to start playing like you care. It's time to start caring, about yourself, about the game and about your fans. It's time to start giving every game your all. It's time to find your passion for the game again, play with your heart. 

I am confused by last night's game. As a fan, I expected a win,  and that isn't what I saw. Instead, I saw a team that just didn't care, and as a fan, that's unacceptable. Your job is to play football, but I don't think that's why you started playing football. Go back to when you started playing football and played because you loved the game. That's what I want to see, I want to see the passion. I want you to play with your heart. If your heart isn't in it, then you might as well not do it. I'm a nurse and my patients are the reason that I do what I do. Your fans should be your reason. Play like your life depends on it, because you love the game that much. If you don't, then figure out why you don't. You, as a team, have the talent. You guys have an amazing talent and yet, you waste it. That's unacceptable, find your passion and use it to fuel you. 

If there is conflict, fix it. I have never seen so much lifelessness in a football team as I did last night and it made me angry and then sad. Your whole reason for playing football should be because you love it and you want to. Find yourself in the game again, if you can't do that, the lifelessness will continue.  

First, find your passion. What makes you passionate about football. Why do you play the game? If you don't love to play anymore, figure out why. You can't be good at something if you are not passionate about it which takes away your motivation. So find your passion. As a nurse, I am passionate about people. I choose to be a nurse because I love people, and I love to help them. If I ever get to the point where I can't do that, then I don't need to be a nurse, or I need to find a different field within nursing. You chose to be a football player, why? Find that passion and live it. Your game, and your life, will change.

The next thing you have to do is find your motivation again. Figure out what's keeping you from being motivated to go out and win every game and fix it. I know that sounds like a pat answer but the truth of the matter is, you are the only one that can motivate you. It's all about your mindset. You have to figure out how to motivate yourself and then do it. Whatever you need, find it. We all have struggles and trials but we all survive them, if we choose to. Sometimes it's as simple as making a choice, to find your motivation. So choose to be motivated, your fans are.

Then, as part of your passion and motivation, find your focus. Whatever you focus on, will help you play the game to the best of your ability and then, you will be happy and the fans will be happy. Happiness will make everything better. Sometimes, it's as simple as a mindset. Focus on what ever you need to but find it.

Find your focus. Find your passion. Make it happen.

Sincerely,

Sarah, a fan

PYHO: Finding out what I really enjoy...

Join up with Shell for PYHO!!!


I have to say that my pseudo-career change shocked me. I say pseudo because I only did it for two days but I knew that it wasn't the right thing for me, after the first day I knew that it wasn't for me, but I gave it another shot just to be sure. I really never thought that I would prefer hospital nursing to home health, I figured it would be the opposite. However, pediatric home health is not for me. Don't get me wrong, I like pediatric nursing, I LOVE kids, they're awesome! I like taking care of them, in the hospital setting but the home care setting was scary. Mainly because I was there alone and I had to make all the decisions. Granted, the kid that I had wasn't terribly acute, in certain ways but still, it was more than I am ready to handle at this stage in my career. 


I'm still a fairly new nurse. I will have been a nurse for a year in August. I got my license in June but didn't start working until August. I never set out to be a floor nurse, I'm planning on getting my master's and being a nurse practitioner. However, until then, I will be working the floor...which surprises me because I didn't figure that I would enjoy it that much, but I do. Plus, there are always other nurses and doctors and respiratory therapists around to help me out, I don't have to do anything alone, like you do in home health. Yes, I make my own decisions but, I have other, more experienced nurses around that can help me. That is a good feeling. I feel like I will always need that, but I know that's not true. I will feel comfortable on my own and there are certain things that I am definitely comfortable doing on my own, but then, there's always that situation that I like having someone else to bounce my ideas off of. 


So there it is, I enjoy being a floor nurse. :) Have a great week you guys!!!

Movie Review: The Lorax

I went to see The Lorax with some friends tonight and I was a little surprised. There was definitely a political message involved, and I have to say I was a little shocked. Granted, the movie was cute and funny but really, since when is a children's platform a place for politics? I doubt that Dr. Seuss was completely political or perhaps he was, I don't know but I don't go to the movies to get political messages. 


The movie was pretty funny, there was a lot of humor. I have to say, that fish are hilarious, as is the Lorax. All of the characters are great...but the overall message was political and that I really didn't like. Ok, so we need to be green minded, and save the planet but I don't need to hear that in a movie. I know this, and I don't want to take my nieces and nephews to see this and them think that if you cut down trees then the world will come to an end. I don't know, I was just disappointed by this. 

PYHO: A Tough Topic

As a nurse, I see many amazing things. My days, or nights, be that as it may, are very rewarding. I enjoy seeing people getting well and going home to their families. But then, there is that other side, when patients are not able to get well or they do not get to go home. They "discharge to Jesus" as we say. It's very sad, but sometimes is just as rewarding, if we are able to allow these people to die with dignity.


I say all of that to say that I have become a huge proponent of the DNR or Do Not Resuscitate. There is a certain point in a person's life when performing chest compressions on them becomes cruel. If you are elderly, your bones are more likely to be brittle and here I am pumping on your chest. I may bring you back to life but then I have created even more problems for you from broken ribs, to a lacerated liver or a punctured lung. I have, in my mind anyway, taken away your quality of life. I think that is wrong. That being said, I know that this is one of the hardest decisions that families have to make, I hate to think that I am going to have to make this choice for my parents at some point. However, knowing what I know, I am confident that I will make the right decision, no matter how awful it seems.


I think that there is a certain point, especially if a person is very ill, that peforming extraordinary life-saving measures is just cruel. That does not mean that the person should be uncomfortable in their last moments of life, they should  just be at peace. I can assure you that having someone perform chest compressions is not peaceful. I think that this is where hospice can be such a blessing, because the patient is allowed to be at peace and die with dignity. They still receive pain medication to help alleviate their pain, but they will not have a tube shoved down their throat or have someone compressing their chest. They will be allowed to move on, to the next stage of their life in peace and I believe this is so very important. 


As a nurse, it is my job to help the patient, whether it be to perform extraordinary life saving measures or allow the patient to die in peace and with dignity. This is a very tough place to be but I urge all of you to consider, what would you want? Please take everything into consideration when making your choice. There is not necessarily a right or wrong choice, just be sure that the choice isn't made selfishly and that the choice is truly the best decision for the patient. 


This is something that has recently become very near and dear to my heart. It pains me very much to think that I will have to make this decision at some point for my loved ones, and yet, I want the very best for them and sometimes, that is not allowing the machine to live for them.