I honestly couldn't come up with anything today when I got up and sat down to blog...so I started reading some of the PYHO posts and was amazed. There are so many amazing stories out there and today, I don't have one. I'm still sitting here debating because my PYHO posts have all been about the same thing lately...I feel very one dimensional, but, it's what's on my mind...so here I go.
I finally got some advice on how to deal with this person who is causing me so much stress. I asked someone very close to me and this is what we came up with. The next time that this person "calls me out", I will look them straight in the eye and very calmly say, "I see you're doing it again". Of course, this person will want to know what I'm talking about, and I will have to explain the "calling me out" thing but at least I will have said what I need to say. The unfortunate thing is that this will happen in front of a group of people because I'm never "called out" in private. I hate this because, while I am not afraid of confrontation, I don't like to have to do it in front of a whole bunch of people. I think that there is a time and place for confrontation but a big group of people is never the place. Alas, I don't have control over it so, inevitably, it will happen. At least I have a solution because the alternative is losing my temper and the person that I spoke to about it said that losing my temper might not be the worst thing that could happen either. I don't want that though because the other person pushes me so far that I might say things that I can't take back...that sometimes happens to me when I get pushed. Obviously, everyone has limits and tends to say things that they shouldn't when they're angry but in this case especially, that would be very bad. (FYI: I'm assuming that the person I'm talking about reads my blogs, that's why I'm not being specific.)
Maybe I'll get lucky and I won't have to do this but I know it's coming, which makes me feel a little better about it. It would be nice to have it over and done with. The part that sucks the most is that it will probably happen right in the middle of the semester when I am super stressed anyway and I may just lose it instead of being able to stay calm...I hope not but really, enough is enough.
8 comments:
I hope you are able to find the strength to stand up for yourself and deal with this person.
Thanks for linking up.
Give your stress wings and let it fly away. ~Terri Guillemets
While I want to say you need to stand up for yourself, I always want to say to let it roll. It's those with small minds and those who are lacking in their own lives who treat others this way. You have a lot to offer the world, do not let this individual bring you down! When/If the time comes and you must defend yourself speak your truth loudly! You do not deserve to be treated this way.
Sending strength your way ♥
I know that feeling. Sometimes it is hard being the bigger person, but it sounds like you are doing all the right things! xoxo
I know the feeling. Dealing with people like that is never easy!
I don't know the history here of what this person is doing to torment, embarrass or otherwise upset you but if they always and only do it in public then you will have to out them in public. Best approach is to stay calm and simply ask them why they are doing it and say how much it upsets you. However they react to that, unless with an apology, they will be the one who comes out looking what they are, the one in the wrong. Good luck!
Thanks for the advice ladies! Unfortunately, this will have to come to a head because it has to stop...there is some latent hostility there that tends to gravitate towards anything or anyone attached to me and I can't have my children treated that way when I have them! :)
Just stand your ground...if the situation presents itself always in crowds, then so be it.
Hopefully if you have had the chance to talk to this person in private, and that didnt work our for whatever reason, then plan B is the way you may have to go.
Dee
Dee--I would love to talk to this person in private but the defenses would immediately go up and it would be pointless, unfortunately. Thanks for the advice!
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